NHL Playoffs

You saw it here first, the perfect NHL playoff picture. Now everyone knows it comes down to the mascots. Never mind who they are actually playing. So lets automatically eliminate the Blues, the Stars, the Wild, the Redwings, Flyers, and the Blue Jackets. Now, we move on to survival of the fittest. A fight between the Sharks, Blackhawks, Penguins, Bruins, and Ducks. Sorry, but the Ducks and Penguins are out. It was a valiant effort by the Hawks, but the Bruins weren't able to be stopped by the winged rats. The land V.S water battle will be decided by the elements. Now we have an Avalanche, and some Lightning. Well this one is easy. Avalanche is snow, snow is water, and water conducts electricity. Lightning beats Avalanche. Now we come back to decide the fight between the Bruins and the Sharks. Well, back to the whole water thing, it looks like the Shark is in for a shocking surprise...(punpunpun). All we have left are the Bruins, Lightning, Canadiens, Kings, and the Rangers. I don't know how the Canadiens are still in it... so they are out. Then we have the Kings... what are they the kings of? Losing? They are out. Okay so we have the Rangers. Now are they Army Rangers or park Rangers? Having to question their identity...out. It's down to the Bruins and Lightning I guess. Well Lightning isn't a living thing, and last time I checked you had to be alive to win the Stanley Cup. SO by a default the Bruins win. Don't question it.